My name is Alana and I’m 13 years old, almost 14 in a few days. At the moment I’m at School in year 7, next year I will be going to high sch...

Alana's Red Letter

22:52:00 Dyslexia Australia 0 Comments

My name is Alana and I’m 13 years old, almost 14 in a few days. At the moment I’m at School in year 7, next year I will be going to high school and I can’t begin to tell you how nervous I am for it. Today I will be telling you my story and how I have to live with Dyslexia each and every day.  

I remember the first time I was told I have Dyslexia. I had test after test after test I hated it so much. I would come late to school because I had a test that morning and my friends would ask me where I was and I never knew what to tell them, they wouldn’t understand, I didn’t even understand or why it was happening half the time. Being in a small room all by myself with a piece of paper and a pencil. As soon as the timer started I would turn over the piece of paper and start, well I would try to. Looking at the questions was giving me a head ache I couldn’t even read it or understand what the question was asking me. I would get so frustrated because I didn’t understand. I would read it over and over again but that never helped. I felt as if it was in a different language. I was just hoping time would pass and It would be over.

It was so quite I could hear the clock ticking, I could hear the front office lady typing away on her computer and then the phone would ring and I could hear her talking on the phone, I could see my mum talking to the psychology who I couldn’t even remember her name if I wanted to ask for help. I would get so distracted. I remember just looking outside the window wishing I was outside because it was such a beautiful day. I would ask myself over and over again why me, why do I have to find everything so hard, why can’t I just be normal. When the time was up it felt like I didn’t even have five minutes to do it, I didn’t even finish the first question probably. 

My mum and dad said that school work will be hard and that I’m always going to have to give 100% in everything I do. They said that you have to work things out the way that helps you the most, for example I’m in year seven and I still us my fingers when counting and I still use my finger when I’m reading a book so I don’t lose track of where I’m. In Primary school I us to get bullied. The people in my class called me stupid and then would just laugh at me. I never really understood why. They would say “I can’t believe you can’t even spell (friends) probably, you should be in reception with all the little kids there smarter then you” I started to believe them, I couldn’t even spell my last name right. I stop trying as hard and I was always so miserable I hated every second, minute and hour of school.

It was just like I’m a white flower with a thousand other red flowers, I didn’t fit in, I was just told that I was too stupid to learn and I will always be behind. I hated in class when the teacher would make you stand up in front of the whole class and make you say your times tables or spell a word. I was always the last person out of class because I never got the answer right. 

When we had relief teachers it was terrible because they don’t understand like all the other teachers I was treated like a normal, I’m not normal I need help can’t they see that. We would ready something as a class and she would get me to read out loud and I said “I don’t want to”, but she made me. For someone with dyslexia reading out loud is like there night mare coming to life. I was so embarrassed it felt like I was reading even slower. I was so nervous I couldn’t even focus on the sentences I was supposed to read. I was just about to speak but she got me to sit down and asked one of the smarter kids in my class to read it I never felt so stupid in my life. I remember asking to go to the bathroom, I would just wait in there hoping the school bell would ring so that I would just miss some of a lesson, that’s how much I hated it. 

I’m not a big fan of Maths or English only because I don’t understand. Well I’m not a fan of school work, assignment and homework to be honest with you. When people ask me what my favourite subject are, well I would say recuses and lunch if that counts but it would probably have to be P.E and Art/music. Over the years I have found new hobbies because of sports and I love going outside and getting really competitive in sport. Art/music is like another world for me I just understand it. I get to express my feeling in a painting and I’m the only one that understands what I have done. I am extremely creative. I have learnt new skills in art. Music, I could listen to music all day long if I could. I feel as if the lyrics are talking to me and it just really relaxes me. 

That white flower among the thousand red ones is me. I’m not stupid, dumb, lazy, a loser or useless. I’m me, the 13-year-old girl with dyslexia. That student that gives 100% in everything she does and try’s her hardest to prove anyone how talented she is. If you understand what I’m talking about and you know how hard it is to live with dyslexia well, I want you to stand up for what you know is right and never ever let anyone bring you down. You’re not the only one in this big world, it’s hard I know there’s challenges and some time you just feel like giving up but you were given dyslexia because we are only one’s that can fight and deal with it each and every day.” Why be normal when you can be special.”

I would like to thank me teacher’s for everything you have done for me I know high school is going to be a big challenge for me but I know I can do it. I will never give up. Through my years at school it has been a great and memorable time through the ups and downs. You guys have made a huge impact in my life and you have supported me through everything. Keep doing what you’re doing because I’m ready for high school and I can’t wait to start and new journey and reach my dreams no matter how big or small they are. 

From Alana